hey,

wooooooo. 2023! we are here. call me nuts but i think 2023 is gonna be a big year. let’s see what happens.

some quick personal updates:

i did my annual reflection retreat in vermont (sunday eve through saturday morning) and it was GLORIOUS. so much review, so many insights, so many dreams and plans emerging. i’m gonna write up some reflections at some point. stay tuned!
i am rewriting my personal values this year (something i am tryna do every five years; thx danielle for the guidance and rhythm on that). i did a good first pass on retreat. we’re looking at top values: transformation, intention, and practice; secondary values: love/justice, vision, community, rest, connection/relationship (need to narrow the secondary list). also my friend chris messinger has a great values list that he’s working through this year (which he does every 10 years). enjoy it!
song of the year: nah gon do by ashh blackwood (thanks, emet for the rec)
i finished the next edit of my book draft yesterday! omgomgomg. we’re not done yet, but it was a big step! i def cried (small c cry) in the middle of cafe nero when i finished. just a bit more editing and then self-publishing and then you can read it (and i can cower in that ‘wtf why did i put that out in public’ feeling lol).
- cover sneak peak here. thanks, annemarie, for designing!
pluto is about to start doing some big work in my rising sign, aquarius, and i’m ready for the ride! hope i can hold on tight (and let go right!) (details if you’re into that sort of thing)
i am excited to be launching a second group coaching cohort (details here —> coaching with lawrence). some benefits as named by the folks who were in the pilot cohort in 2022: it’s easier to be vulnerable when someone else is being vulnerable, too; seeing someone else be coached can help surface things you could benefit from working on; being able to debrief being coached is great!

ok! and now so non-personal things:

check out and snag the intelligent mischief 2023 calendar. aisha’s collages are »>
selma, alabama hit was hit hard by tornadoes earlier this month (news article here). if you have funds to share with folks in a hard spot, directing to the black belt community foundation would be great!
my friend ray pang shared this mindful masculinity workbook and it looks great. it’s already sold out once but akpress is offering more. get it while it’s hot!
my friend maureen shared this hilarious giving tree alternate ending that’s got EXCELLENT guidance for how to set boundaries.

ok last thought: since this is the first real newsletter in a while, it’s VERY FULL. tread lightly, pick some quick hits, and then keep it moving. :) welcome to 2023, friends. lfg.

on to the things!

(!!) pick of the pack

writing

some things i’ve written since the last newsletter:

Jan 14, 2023 | book review: until we reckon by danielle sered

quotes

there is nothing new under the sun. (this month there are SEVENTEEN quotes. i typically aim for like 7-9. if 17 is overwhelming, just pick 3 at random and then keep scrolling past).

It's one year from now. December 2023. The habit you were hoping to build during the year didn't stick. What is the most likely reason it failed? — james clear
The goal of life is to die young — as late as possible! — Ashley Montagu

Power is influence over external events.
Peace is influence over internal events. — James Clear

When you fall in love with the process rather than the product, you don’t have to wait to give yourself permission to be happy. You can be satisfied anytime your system is running. — James Clear

Love… is seeing the unity under the imaginary diversity. — Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj

Remember that you do not have to be a medicine man in order to do your part to restore wholeness and fullness to a world in dire need. You just have to learn to come home to the magic that waits at the core of your truest Self. — Gibrán Rivera

What makes a river so restful to people is that it doesn’t have any doubt—it is sure to get where it is going, and it doesn’t want to go anywhere else. — Hal Boyle

I have noticed that when all the lights are on, people tend to talk about what they are doing — their outer lives. Sitting round in candlelight or firelight, people start to talk about how they are feeling – their inner lives. They speak subjectively, they argue less, there are longer pauses.
To sit alone without any electric light is curiously creative. I have my best ideas at dawn or at nightfall, but not if I switch on the lights — then I start thinking about projects, deadlines, demands, and the shadows and shapes of the house become objects, not suggestions, things that need to done, not a background to thought. — Jeanette Winterson

Your calendar is a better measure of success than your bank account. — James Clear

If you want to create something but feel it has already been done 1000 times, remember: There is always room for quality. — James Clear

In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. — Albert Camus

You never change things by fighting the existing reality. To change something, build a new model that makes the existing model obsolete. — Buckminster Fuller

Risk is an essential need of the soul. The absence of risk produces a kind of boredom which paralyses in a different way from fear, but almost as much. — Simone Weil

10-year dreams. 5-minute actions.
Where do I want to be in 10 years?
What can I do in the next 5 minutes to contribute to that outcome? — James Clear

You can graduate with the finest degrees. You can read the most useful books. You can enjoy the loving support of family and friends.
But your degrees can’t take action for you. Your books can’t make the decision for you. Your family can’t live your life for you.
There is no substitute for courage. At some point, you have to make the choice. — James Clear

I know now, after fifty years, that the finding/losing, forgetting/remembering, leaving/returning, never stops. The whole of life is about another chance, and while we are alive, till the very end, there is always another chance. — Jeanette Winterson